The Job Proposal That Shifted My Spirit

Years ago, I discovered a company that felt, to me, like it would be awesome to work at. The name of the company meant “shift.”

The prospect of working there consumed my mind for a while. They were not hiring but I spent weeks preparing to approach them. I invested meticulous time writing out a proposal and planning the conversation that I would have with them. I was already employed and somewhat comfortable with my job, but I was so captured by this company and couldn’t help but invest energy in preparing to shoot my shot. Because this was the first time that I was stepping up to create my own opportunity, preparing to shoot my shot made me dig deep into myself. What was only supposed to be a job proposal turned into a longer personal process of reflecting on what I wanted and didn’t want for my life.

After a long wrestle with myself and some procrastination, I finally sent the proposal. The founder was interested and asked that we meet. Yayi!

We had the meeting and the chat was amazing! Yayi!

A few weeks later the founder asked that we meet up again. Yayi!

This time she did most of the talking, updating me on what the company was up to. She then eventually told me that they couldn’t afford to hire me. Boo!

The meeting ended with us agreeing to keep in contact and our relationship remained good. I was disappointed but content and proud that I took up the initiative.

The memory of this moment in my life was brought back to me when I was going through some old journal entries where I documented the whole experience. I laughed when I noticed that my interest in that company came at a time when I was about to find out that fanele ngithwase (undergo my ancestral initiation). The name of the company meant “shift” and it dawned on me that it was the energy of that name that had been influencing me then. It was the catalyst that my ancestors and universe brought forward to start the motion of my spiritual transition.

In hindsight, wanting to work there really made me wake up to myself – I literally spent weeks digging through myself for it. My desire was moving me from accepting what was and into choosing what I think I deserve and am capable of.

I still remember how vibrant my energy was when I had those meetings with the founder. I had never felt that high and activated; it opened something that I had never felt in me. It was literally a SHIFT.

Ironically, my life is now made up of what I wanted to do at that company. They couldn’t hire me, but it turned out that my proposal was being processed by God and my ancestors.

This moment in my life and my recollection of it was an exhibition of how mysterious and creative God and our ancestors can be in helping us reach destiny. Every moment in our lives is preparation for the next moment. There’s not a single breath that you take that is in vain, even in those moments that seem like a failure.

I’m reminded of a line that I read from one of Deepak Chopra’s books:

“God is a process.”