Trauma Is Not Polite

Sometimes violation looks ordinary.

It can have a calm appearance and soft sound, looking harmless to the one that it is happening to.

A harmful secret.

Trauma eventually exposes the secret. Trauma doesn’t know time, sequence or any kind of organisation. At any given moment it triggers a flood of feelings, none of which will be too late or too early to hit. Because feelings are eternally relevant.

Trauma can’t be contained. It will lay its mess before anyone at anytime. It doesn’t wish to carry itself well. It will not politely knock at the door of your breath.

It will barge through seemingly small cracks, ones you think are not big enough to accommodate any further pain.

Trauma is resilient. It finds a way into you, caring less about your rules and plans for the day.

So,

don’t ask me why I only chose to speak up now, when it’s a miracle that I can still speak at all.

When I vocalise my pain,

don’t look at the time.

My trauma is not polite.